Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Mevs' Thanksgiving Day Picks

One of my favorite holidays is finally here, and I'm here to give you the picks you could certainly live without but just might stumble upon and find something that you like.

Thanksgiving is a time that everyone should sit back and recognize what they're appreciative of. It could be fairly simple or it could be something large. I realize this time of year every year despite all of the incessant bitching that I do, I have it pretty good. In fact, I wouldn't trade places with anyone in this world. At least not at this moment. Ask me on Monday when I have to go back to work and I'll most likely say I want to be the President or Tom Brady or someone else that doesn't have to beg, borrow, and steal for a living. But for right now, I'll be content to eat about four meals tomorrow, none of which I had to make myself and hopefully I get to see most of these three gems that we've got going tomorrow.

The first game of the day is the one I've had circled on my calendar all year. I've had a feeling about this one.

Green Bay at Detroit (+6)
I really like the Lions to shock the world in this one. I not only think they'll cover, but I think they'll find a way to score 7's on a few more possessions than the Packers will. I am loving Detroit this season, they are explosive and fun to watch. Their coach is a shit-stirring little mousey prick. Give me the Lions over the Pack 34-30 in a game that people will remember seeing on Turkey Day for a while.

Miami at Dallas (-7)
Can anyone tell me about this little Turkey Day history lesson:

The Dolphins might be 4-1 on Turkey Day, but Dallas is just playing too well right now. Demarco Murray is a stud, a future star in the NFL and they've finally realized that it's more effective to run the ball rather than swing pass you to death.

I'm all over the Cowboys in this one. Cowboys 27, Miami 9 right around the time you need to take a nap.

Onto our next match-up.

Green Bean Casserole (+4) vs. Broccoli Bake
Mom always made me green bean casserole, and I've been hooked my whole life. I'll miss it tomorrow. The in-laws make something called Broccoli Bake which is basically a few pieces of green vegetable buried inside some cheese.

Pumpkin Pie vs. Pumpkin Roll (+10)
Another underrated delight of this festivus. So you're telling me that I can get the whip cream and pumpkin flavor without even having to put in the work of applying the high calorie topping? Count me in, and cut me another piece.

Winter Warmer (-8) vs. Wine with dinner
I'm going to pick up some Harpoon and hope for the best.

Prime Rib (-14.5) vs. Ham
Why have I ever wasted my time with ham? Ham can suck a big one. It does nothing for you. It's often dry. It's honestly the ugly stepbrother of Canadian Bacon and I have to have it shoved in my face for all the big time holidays. Always hated when mom or grandma had a ham in the oven.

Small talk with your in-laws vs. Doing Black Friday in New York City (PUSH)
For the first time ever on MTD, I'm predicting a tie. That's because both of these are hideous and they're both going to occur for me in the next 48 hours! Forget me watching LSU and Arkansas on Friday and laying around with my hand down my pants like a slob. I'll be waking up at 6 am to head to New York City to just 'be part of it all' as my wife would say. No destination. No real plan. Certainly not enough money to buy anything in that elitist city. I'm just going to be 'part of it'. Terrific. You guys all enjoy the great NCAA games while I get crotch chafing from all the miles I walk and pay 8.00 for a water with lemon when I stop to rest my head.

But, like I said it's a push. I don't know why it's so hard for me to feel at home with my second family. My mother in law is great. I love her uncles. But there is always one guy who marries into the family that has to be a huge dick. I'm looking at you, Uncle John. That's right. Last year when you sat there and watched the Dallas game while I had to clean up, I was insanely jealous of you. You lazy, high school principle. Sorry we can't all have two weeks off this time of year. Don't move, I'll clean up your plate and soiled napkin while you continue to ignore me because my wife asked me to. Don't lift a finger.

There is one of these in every family I assume. At least one.

Finally, we have the Har-bowl.

San Francisco at Baltimore (-3.5)
Look, San Francisco's defense is nasty and all; but big brother is going to take the younger brother to school. And I'm sure at game's end the real storyline will be all about two brothers embracing at midfield and sharing in a Thanksgiving rendition of koombaya. This should be an absolute slugfest and I wish I had NFL Network to watch it. We'll go Ravens 17, 49ers 13.

I want to wish everyone who wanders here and reads MTD regularly a safe and happy Thanksgiving. Be thankful, if for nothing else; for another year. We're all fortunate in some way shape or form. And thanks to MTD the man to letting me have this terrific forum to go .500 on my picks each week. I've been promising you deliverance and tomorrow, we shock the world and dine on marshmellow beats! Fiyyyyyyah!